It's funny how life can blow you in different directions with the slightest breeze. I have had pictures and subjects I have wanted to blog about the last couple days and life just got away from me. There is something you should know about me...I almost always have the best intentions in the world. But it's my follow-through that lacks. My mom told me once and I know she is 100% right, "Sarah, you are a wonderful mother but your greatest struggle is going to be the same one I struggled with and that is being consistent." I'll start having Family Night regularly, or scripture study, or organizational systems or whatever and I start out gung-ho and something happens and it all falls apart. Whether it be a lack of time, energy, kids going banzai or whatever, my best intentions seem to fall by the wayside. Then I beat myself up and feel overwhelmed.
What I want and aspire to is living life more aware and more deliberately. To not let those moments derail me and all those lovely intentions of mine. To be what I want to be, not merely hope for it. I have been in a little funk of negativity the last week or two. I told my friend Laura, I don't know what is wrong with me. My life is better now than it has ever been, but I still felt like biting everyone's heads off. I let whatever was going on around me (kids screaming/fighting, rushing to get out of the house, whatever...) get to me. I was letting external influences determine my mood.
I have spent the last couple of days trying to get a hold of myself and to, pardon the expression, "Pull my head out of my butt." But I got the extra push this morning from Justin, who has also seemed to be overwhelmed lately, as he happily bounced down the stairs and said "I just listened to the greatest TED talk!!" Seeing him lightened and happy made me lightened and happy and it made me grateful that he was catching the vision I was trying to catch myself.
He shared the link with me and I too loved it. This TED Talk (which we LOVE! Way better than mindlessly watching t.v.) talks about the importance of positive outlook and how it determines our reality and not the other way around. It's funny, informative and left me with a smile on my face. If you want to check it out, click here.
I am going to try the recommended actions for creating lasting positive change that the presenter shared...
* 3 Gratitudes (Recognize three new things you are grateful for every day for 21 days. This will retrain your brain towards a more positive outlook.)
*Journaling (Write down one positive experience you had that day.)
*Exercise (Need to work on this...trains your brain that behaviors matter.)
*Meditation (Resist the urge to multi-task and truly focus on what you are doing in a moment.)
*Random Acts of Kindness (contact one person every day with words of kindness or affirmation.)
I know my faults are many and that I will always be a work in progress. But I am excited to at least feel like I am equipped with tools in bringing about personal success and not just hoping I am able to become the person I know I could be.